Ever wondered if there was a secret to getting that cute guy or girl to approach you and how to get them to make the first move? Or if your body language was sending the wrong message? In this episode of The Love Destination Expert Series, Relationship and Body Language Expert Katia Loisel from thelovedestination.com reveals the secret to sending green light signals that will have them approaching you in no time at all.
So how do I get someone to make the first move?
“One of the questions that I get asked the most often is, ‘How do I get somebody to come and approach me without actually getting out of my chair and making the first move?’ said Loisel.
If you’re a woman you’re already making the first move explains Loisel.
“For the girls out there, the thing that you need to realize is that women actually make a lot more moves and send out a lot more signals than men. However, they very rarely make the first move. But you make eye contact, you smile and that sends signals of interest,” Katia explained to The Love Destination Expert Series.
“The more signals you send out, the more attractive you actually are to the opposite sex. So if you want somebody to approach you what you need to do is send out green light signals that say, ‘Hey I’m interested, come and talk to me’. And you can’t do that if you’re sitting at the other end of the room.
Get into their flirting zone
“So the first thing you need to do is get in within their flirting zone. So closer than one point five metres away. In our study of over 1500 people 88% of those surveyed said that when they first meet someone their first thought is that person’s not interested in me or isn’t going to like me. If you’re not close enough or you’re not sending people enough signals then frankly they’re not going to know that you’re interested. So you need to get closer than one point five metres away to be in their flirting zone,” revealed Loisel.
Do a mental checklist of your body language
“Secondly, do a mental checklist of your body language,” suggests Loisel. “Ask yourself the question, ‘Would I approach me?’. If the answer is no you need to make some changes.”
Is your body language open and approachable
“Next you need to uncross our arms and legs. Make sure that body language is open and approachable, make eye contact and smile. Now if you’re too scared to make eye contact with a person that you really think is gorgeous, then just make eye contact around the room, smile, remain open and approachable and think the words ‘Hello, here I am’, explains Relationship and Body Language Expert Katia Loisel.
Watch this episode of The Love Destination Expert Series as Relationship and Body Language Expert Katia Loisel the secret to getting them to make the first move.
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“Next what you need to do is you need to lock eyes with the person you’re attracted to. Lock eyes, make eye contact and give them your flirtiest smile, and hold that smile for four seconds,” said Loisel.
“That’s going to send a subconscious signal to their brain that you’re interested. It’s also going to send a rush of phenelethylamine, (that’s the natural love drug that gives you those butterflies in your tummy). You don’t want to go more than four seconds because phenelethylamine is also related to fight and flight, so it also makes someone feel really uncomfortable.”
“After four seconds, give them your flirtiest smile. Look away for about 20 seconds before looking back. Then give them a smile and think of the words, ‘You are gorgeous, come and talk to me’,” reveals Loisel.
“From a non-verbal perspective you’re sending out over ten thousand stimuli. These say ‘Hello baby, come and talk to me,’ and if you’re thinking those words then you can’t be thinking “OMG, I’m an idiot. What am I doing?” Then what you need to do is you need to sit there, make eye contact and wait, but keep thinking those really positive thoughts. Sometimes people don’t quite the message or they think “Is that for me?” or they might be in a relationship. Eventually you’ll find that they’ll coming walking over. Otherwise get up and move. After all, what have you got to lose?” said Loisel.
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